It's Raining

It’s Raining

Last week I went home to Minnesota and the local churches were gathering together for rain prayers. The fields have been horrible dry this summer and the crops are not doing well. Today on CNN you can see the Minnesota, South Dakota, Wisconsin, and Nebraska along with several other states are in the midst of flood and thunderstorm warnings. It has been raining and will continue to rain over the next 3 days. And so as I sit here typing this I have to wonder if there is indeed some connection between the two?

Pack Pack Packing.....

So I found a new place to live in Vermillion. It is a trailer which I was not too excited about, but I walked through and I thought about it thoroughly and it really seemed the best option at this point. See I have these two furry things that live with me, that landlords seem to be desperately afraid of. I started packing a few days ago, and have so far managed to pack 8 totes. Which containt my dishes and the nicknack's in my living room. The next will be the book case, Then the DVD's. The bathroom and finally the bedroom. Woo hoo. I think I'm making good time though. It always seems no matter how much you plan and try to be very thorough it always seems that when it comes down to the last second, it is rush rush rush rush rush. Oh well. I hope everything goes over well, and that my new place turns out to be as lovely as this place, because I really like living here.

Pondering

What is it about us as humans that allows us to have complete disregard for each other and for ourselves. Why do we do things knowing that it is disrespectful to someone else. That our actions could cause someone else pain. And these are not things we can apologize for. We can not go back and say oh I am sorry I did not mean to do this, or to hurt. To do that would be a lie because we do these things, fully aware of the consequences, fully aware of our actions, and yet we don't care. I know that I personally feel better about myself when I do things that don't harm people. When I can walk through life with a clean conscience. And I stray like all humans do. I do things and then I look back and think wow that was a really shitty thing I did. Or I could have handled myself differently. I think part of growing up is learning how to become a better person. It is making mistakes and learning and somehow redeeming yourself for the actions you have taken. I don't strive to be perfect. I don't think anyone is perfect, but I want to be a good person, and to do good things for myself and for the people around me.

I just finished watching The US vs. John Lennon, I never know what to expect from a documentary. This particular documentary appeared to be straight to the point, it had very interesting news clips and interviews from a wide variety of politicians, radicals, and other figures in the media. I have never read or study the John Lennon case, or anything outside of his musical background so whither or not the documentary was accurate I am unable to say, but it was such an interesting account. John Lennon’s life not only as a musician but also as an activist and most of all as a human being was extraordinary.
Questions always arise in my mind when watching information from this era. Has society lost its touch? Have we become so accustomed to bowing down to the system that standing up for what believe has taken a low priority on our list of things to accomplish. Are we so used to war and other criminal activities that we no longer question the government’s actions when dealing with these situations. When looking back, the 60’s and 70’s have become looked upon as decades of change, decades of making a difference. Decades that truly molded our country into what it is today. But everyday decisions are being made, history is still being changed, and it seems in our fast growing world, we no longer take the time or make the effort to follow progress, or regression. Are the actions taking place in this day and age, any less important than those made 40 years ago. Do the actions we take today not affect those of future generations, as much as the actions of our parents affected us.
I’m sure this sounds like the usual blabber. How can we make a difference? Blah Blah Blah. I’m not suggesting becoming radicals, storming capitols, Causing chaos. I am simply saying that maybe we close our eyes to quickly at what is happening around us. That we should look not only at the past and present, but what we can do to ensure a livable future for those who come after us. I think it is important to exist peacefully, to recognize the difference between those around the world, and embrace those differences with understanding. And realize that understanding and acceptance are not the same thing. I think it is important to question that which we don’t understand,
I am just as guilty as the next person of being indifferent, of being to busy to attempt to make a difference, to busy surviving to strive for something greater than what we have. It’s just something for all of us to think about. None the less this was an excellent documentary.

And I cried myself to sleep.

It's been awhile since I cried myself to sleep. I was on the phone with my mom and I didn't get to sleep until around noon today. I guess the money situation and everything just caught up with me, and I just let it out. It really feels like everything is falling part. And I'm trying desperately to keep it all together. I just keep hoping that this will work itself out. that some how it will all become just a little bit easier. It's off to work again, I need to shower and eat and then drive my happy ass to work.

So The Internet Is Back Up and Running.

My internet is back up and running. Although I must say the week without it was rather refreshing. I think I am definitely going to start limiting myself to the amount of time I spend casually looking at complete crap when I could be doing productive or creative. So thats my plan. The hole financial aid thing is still going to hell, hopefully I will be able to figure something out. And unlike last year, I am actually excited about school starting. I have this feeling like things are going to be really good. I hope I'm not sorely disappointed.

Still without internet.

So I'm sitting at Taco John's still without internet. I thought I would actually make it through the entire day until my mom called to tell me the loan papers didn't come through correctly and I needed to e-mail them again. Went to the cable company, they were no help, in fact they told me to call customer service followed by "but there moving the offices so your not going to be able to get a hold of anyone." So I went to the store and bought the latest copy of Jane and Vogue and I sat outside and read which was really nice and made me wonder why I didn't do stuff like that more often. So I think I will definitely try before the weather goes bad. Otherwise I watched the first disc of Dead Like Me but to my disappointment it only had the pilot epidsode on it so I must wait until tomorrow to get the other 13 episodes. I've been cutting and pasting pictures into my mini art book that was laying unused in a box, and I have been getting this urge to write so I think I will give it a try tonight and see what happens. Ta Ta for now!

Does it get any better than this?

The New York Jets meet Elmo on Season 38 of Sesame Street

http://www.muppetcentral.com/news/2007/011607.shtml

I had heard of this series, but I never got around to watching it. But I used my free hours of TV downloads on Netflix to watch the first episode and I have now ordered the entire first season to watch. I find it fabulous! It is truley a unique idea, and so funny. It reminded me of a short story written by a fried of my called Two Urinals From Death. Unfortunately there is no way for me to link you to the story, but it is wonderfully creative. Anyways I am sure I will be updating with lots of laughs about this TV show!

Somersault

I had to start watching this movie twice, it took a bit to get into it, but once I put away all the distractions and focused on the plot, I thought it was a pretty good movie. Definitely an interesting story compared to most. Not recommended for anyone who hates British or foreign cinema, but if your a fan of these genre's I would definitely check this out.

A Quick Update!

So I have not forgotten about my blog. I currently do not have internet service at home. I would like to take the responsibility of this and say I just didn't pay the bill, but the fact is midcontinent communications are a bunch of fucks and I have no cable, no internet, a 350.00 for two months service, not to mention they gave me a lovely phone call at 1:00am on Saturday morning. Yes 1:00am. I was completely livid.

So over the last week I made the trip home to see my mom. When I got there the dog was very ill and I spent my first day at the vet with her. She seems to be doing fine now. I saw my grandma who seems to be doing by the day. Her memory is week but physically she seems so much stronger. My mom made her second trip to the Mayo clinic and the doctors believe that she should heal and not be as sick as she has been.

I went to my ex boyfriends graduation, and I use the term ex boyfriend weakly because we are crossing that barrier into just friends and he deserves to be entitled as something else as just an X. Graduation was hard, it took several deep breathes and a lot of self control. Not to mention a roller coaster of emotion and a close ditch towards the beginning of the ceremony. But despite feeling replaced and completely out of my element, I made it. And I am glad I went because if I stayed home I would have regretted it and ended up feeling petty.

I found out that my financial aid is not enough to cover my tuition, I am severely behind on my bills and need desperately to find a new apartment in Vermillion. So one day at a time I am taking everything. I am going to start clearing out crap and packing up the things I don't use everyday. Like dishes, I tend to use paper plates. I am looking forward to school starting. I really should have tried to fill in a different class on Monday Wednesdays and Friday and to drop my class on Tuesdays and Thursday. I don't know yet if that is going to happen though.

I am also in the process of purchasing my airplane ticket and getting stuff together for my high school reunion, although the date of the reunion could not be worse for me since it is the weekend of the first full week of school and it requires me missing class.
Work is about the same. Same old bullshit different day.

I have tons of other stuff to write about, vent about and so on and so forth but at last I have to leave soon and do not have time for an update.
Topics that have been at the top of conversations lately.
The bridge collapsing in Minneapolis.
The Rugby team.
Football season.
Old friends, new crises.
And so on and so forth.
But this is it for now. Until later take care!